A while back there was the scandal, in the kpop world, of bullying within the group AOA.
I really liked the group. Ok, I merely liked them. I liked their title tracks, they never missed but then my girl Choa left and it wasn’t the same.
So I’m sure you’re familiar with what happened, if not you can look it up.
So fans or just people in general who sympathised with Mina started to bully Jimin and Seolhyun. They were probably angry and wanted to vent that anger at the causes of Mina’s pain.
However it got me thinking, is that really the best way to go about it? Is that the best way to help someone who has been bullied, to bully their bully?
I got bullied pretty badly in my teenage years, it was not fun. It got to the point I really dreaded going to school but I still went, bidding my time till I could escape. Luckily for me everyone turned on my bully, because she bullied everyone, and so she had to leave.
When I say turned on her they didn’t bully her, at least not to my knowledge, it’s more like they ignored her. At the end of the day the girl wanted to be popular and to be popular you need friends and so she lost all her friends because of her bullying activities.
You could argue shunning is a form of bullying but they weren’t intending to bully her, they just want her to leave them alone.
I honestly think that is the best solution. We should ignore the bully and not give them any of our time or attention.
We should rather help the victim in whatever way we can because they need our attention more than the bully, no?
It is also a good idea to make sure that the bully doesn’t get away with their crime, depending on the form of bullying done. Some forms of bullying are really hard to police to be honest.
The reason I don’t like the approach of bullying the bully is because that doesn’t make us better than them. That doesn’t make what we’re doing right. Bullying is wrong no matter your reasoning.
I would rather serve cold and clean justice to the bully and help the victim.
Back to my school experience, if they had bullied the girl who was a bully and bullied her just as badly as she did us, that would not have been a good thing. She was young and foolish, she was going through her own crap. As they say, hurt people hurt people. She needed help herself, not from me, but from others who could help her.
Of course each case is different and each bully needs to be dealt with in different ways. It’s just, if you’re going to bully someone you must be ready for the consequences of your actions, you have to be ok with it because even bad people can be broken. Even bad people are human.
In the case of Jimin and Seolhyun. I don’t like what they did, and they definitely should face the consequences of their actions by losing their career and status, that’s only fair given what they did to Mina. That is a bad punishment.
Think about it, they’re famous. They were on top, to lose that is no small thing.
In the same vein, if there’s a bully at work they should lose their position. At school they should be given help and also disciplined. Adults who bully, should also get therapy.
Those are effective ways to manage and discipline bullies and to change their ways for a better future.
We don’t need to bully them, as bulling them helps no one. It only makes you feel better.
Then towards victims like Minah, they deserve all the help and care they can get. They need to be cocooned in a warm loving environment. They deserve most of our energy.
Anyway, that is all. I hope that made sense.