I’m here to talk about something serious that some of us experience at least once in our lives.
It’s been called a silent killer and that is very true. A lot of people suffer in silence and you on the outside will never know what’s going on in their mind.
When the mind is sick, it’s a deadly thing. Your mind is so powerful, it controls everything! It makes you move, breathe and sleep. Your mind is an intricate computer that no one can replicate, despite how much A.I. scientists try.
But the problem with mental illness is it is not always visible. You can’t physically see depression. It’s not like we have x-ray vision and can just look into someone’s brain and see if they are depressed. Which is why the stigma against mental illnesses needs to be done away with because we really need to talk to each and to help each other.
For those of you who are suffering from this, I believe 100% that there is someone in your life who wants to help you, who would listen. Even so there’s no shame in getting help. You would treat a broken arm and so why not treat your mind that is sick? That needs to be taken care of?
If you follow my blog you know I love Kpop. Recently Jonghyun from SHINee committed suicide and it is believed he did so because of his depression. His note was released and in it he talked about being lonely (paraphrasing) and wanting to do a good job, or wanting to know he had done a good job.
When I heard the news it broke my heart. He was such a lovely, fierce and talented man. He was so young as well, not that much older than me. To think that he’s gone is sad. I think about those who have been left behind, the members who were like family and his actual family… it’s sad. My condolences to all those who are grieving.
So hearing the news and reading his note it got me thinking. In Kpop everything is controlled and they always strive for perfection. They surrender themselves to their art, sacrificing their personal lives, and it’s killing some of them. Something needs to change.
But it’s not just in Kpop, in fact, but in life. Even me, when I finished University and a year later I got my driving license I thought, “Yes I’ve done it all, I’ve achieved what I set out to achieve.” But then I started to think, “What now? I should get a job”. But everything I tried failed and I wasn’t doing anything good with my life and I honestly thought, “What is even the point of me being here?” And once those thoughts start to come in it’s hard to get them out again. I fell into such a dark pit that I did not know how to get out. I did not want to do anything, I just wanted to disappear.
But honestly God got me through it. I never truly gave up during that time as whenever I came close a voice in my head would counter all my negative thoughts. “But you have your friends and your parents… But you haven’t lived yet… It’s okay to fail there’s still more for you!” Again and again that voice, being God, would encourage me until God helped me out of that dark pit. So I thank God for that, for He saved me.
I also thank God for my friend, I didn’t confide in anyone apart from one person. And for me that was extremely helpful being able to talk about it with someone. It helps you to not feel as alone, knowing someone cares. Also taking it one day at a time. I would just do that and set little goals and achieve them little by little. One thing I focused on that also helped was going to the gym. I don’t know how but focusing on my gym goals and having that to look forward to helped.
We don’t need to be perfect. We don’t need money to be happy. My title is, We’re Not Perfect… Yet because until Jesus comes back we’re not perfect! He hasn’t come back to wipe away every tear yet. (Of course this is from a Christian perspective). In this world we are going to fail, we are going to mess up and life is going to go bad but we can get up again. The sun will rise again, day always follows night, with every down there is an up. I know what I’m saying sounds cliche but I honestly believe that.
So don’t give up and please, forget about being perfect. Just be you. The fact that you’re living and doing your best is good enough.
So #letustalk about depression, let it not be a taboo subject. Let us look after each other. Don’t be afraid to confide in someone. I would like to help people even if it’s just to lend a listening ear.